Grace.
Sunday, November 15, 2009, 01:54 p.m. #1643.
Not being graceful is one thing, being intrusively ungraceful is a sin.
Not sure if I've blogged about this PRC teacher before. The first week when he came to our school a few years back, I was shocked to see him spit at the corridor on the concrete ground (the spit was reddish pink, by the way). I was flabbergasted and speechless then. My colleagues have also reportedly seen him spit into the plastic bin at his office desk (with no trashbag lining). I cannot bear the thought of our cleaners having to clear up such irresponsible and virulent filth.
Then last week, I met him at the washroom when he just came out of a cubicle. I'd only wanted to wash my hands and make a quick exit but I smelled a stench that was so bad that I forced myself to find out what could have been the source of such a formidably pungent emanation (yep, I must be a little sadistic). To my horror, in the cubicle that the PRC teacher just came out from, I saw a big splatter of you-know-what - a brown mixture of solids and liquids (and evidently, gases as well) - all around the toilet. And I really meant, ALL AROUND. Was this guy standing when he did his business? I have never seen such a disgusting mess - not even when I was in China!
And I don't recall seeing him wash his hands before he went out of the washroom.
I don't believe this is a matter of different cultures - it's really about personal hygiene, and whether a person is willing to make efforts to adapt to a new environment even if the lifestyle may be different. If he still hasn't changed and adjusted himself after so many years, then I think this person really has a serious problem.
I am not too proud of some Singaporeans in the arena of grace as well. Only yesterday, at the foodcourt, I saw a little boy just sitting down at an empty table, when a girl in her twenties rushed to the table, pointed at a packet of tissue paper on the table, and gave the boy a disgusted, disapproving look - like he'd done something gravely wrong. The boy meekly got up and walked away.
I could have walked over to reprimand the girl - if I was truly so graceful myself - but I didn't. I was afraid the all-too-efficient cleaners would clear my food and the waiting crowd would swarm in and take over my seat in an instant. You see, I didn't have a packet of tissue paper with me.
New Life.
Friday, November 13, 2009, 08:45 p.m. #1642.
Friday the thirteenth today. Was so busy that I didn't realise it until I saw the meter on my homebound cab. While this has been a terribly long and tiring day, it's also the day that I passed my interview for the position of Head of Department.
Started the day with a four-hour meeting, which left me with neither break nor lunch before my colleague and I went for my HOD interview together (my principal drove the two of us there - so sweet, isn't she?). We only realised that the interview schedule had been pushed back when we reached there, so we had to wait for an hour with no food in sight (the canteen was closed and the interview venue was quite secluded).
The interview, however, went very smoothly. I didn't feel that it was an interview at all - it was more like an informal conversation - sure, the panel seemed intimidating, with four principals facing me, but the topic of discussion was really just about my area of focus, so I actually felt very comfortable throughout the session. I was having a very bad headache before the interview due to that very intensive meeting in the morning, but the headache cleared after the interview.
And so, my colleague and I went back to school after that. I ate a few biscuits, and I carried on with my work with my committees (strategic planning and streaming), one after another. Before I knew it, it was seven. Realising that all that sustained me for today was one slice of bread at 5 a.m. and those three pieces of biscuits at 4 p.m., I decided I'd better go home.
That's when I read the meter on my homebound cab. No wonder the day felt rather crappy (besides the interview, ironically) - it's supposed to be an unlucky (and probably hungry) day! And yep, I received the confirmation that I passed the interview.
Not sure if that's good news, but I am excited about my "new life" next year.
Sweet Reward.
Sunday, November 8, 2009, 10:06 a.m. #1641.
A heartening post written by my student...
I WILL TRY MY BEST FOR A DISTINCTION FOR SCIENCE.Personally, if I hear my teacher's voice in my head during my exam, I'll freak out. Nevertheless - while it's a bit mushy, it's a sweet and gratifying feeling, to know that someone's confidence is built upon you.
And make 3 people very proud.
Actually more for Mr Tan and my tutor. They really gave me hope for my sciences. Thanks a lot ah, if you happen to be reading this post.
OH! OH! OH!
MR TAN! MR TAN!
IF YOU'RE READING THIS, I HAVE SOMETHING TO TELL YOU.
Actually ah, it's more of a secret.
I don't know whether you'll think of it as disturbing or sweet.
You know every time I do physics questions, when I read the question,
I imagine it's you personally asking me the question.
You know your voice ~
the very happy, comforting voice.
Then it's like, you'll keep prompting me.
And I seem to understand better and answer better, you know?
Like, really, really.
Thanks ah, Mr Tan!
You're the best ~
Don't worry, I'll do my best to make you proud!
A for science!
Umbrella.
Saturday, November 7, 2009, 07:48 p.m. #1640.
A beautifully short and wistful piece written by my colleague...
《伞》
刚刚接触这把伞时，我并没有什么喜悦，甚至内心是厌恶的。
慢慢的算是接受了它，因为每次都是你推我让的。明明是一把很普通的伞，最后却成了我们之间，千丝万缕的联系之一。
时过境迁，早已经物是人非，伞却留了下来。我没有过多的珍惜，甚至没有过一次触景伤情想起过往的曾经。只是把它当做一把伞，随手的一个工具而已。
今早，狮城雨季。瓢泼。
我完全没有顾忌的在两把伞中间，选择了这把借给室友。没有丝毫的犹豫。
结果今日一别，真的是不知何日再见。室友满怀歉意的打给我，伞落在我学校附近的食阁。
她建议我去找一找，我断然拒绝，不是我不珍惜，是真的没有什么必要，很久的伞，很旧的一把伞...
下班了，我惊觉自己对那把伞是有所留恋的。隐隐的，似乎不痛不痒，你却没办法忽视它的存在。我感觉自己没有做好准备，它永远的遗失在某个角落。黑黑的，湿湿的...
Embrace.
Saturday, November 7, 2009, 07:24 p.m. #1639.
The past few weeks had been the busiest period in my worklife so far - and the following weeks are not going to be any better. While I'd wanted to meet up with some of my weaker graduating students just before their O level papers, I couldn't find time to do that at all - not only the workdays had been fully occupied with meetings and other administrative things, I had to write the notes of meeting every night. Work reviews, SP (strategic planning), SEM (school excellence model), Streaming... all that S'es... It's not that I'm not happy doing all these (I am a workaholic after all), it's actually great that I get to appreciate the bigger picture of education better, and that I have a wider span of control over what can potentially help the students holistically. It's just that I really miss those times when things were simpler - when teaching was really essentially about teaching - of course, that's actually quite impossible in the present context - but still, it used to essentially about teaching. Coming up with and thinking about interesting stuff for lessons used to be something that I enjoy doing, now this has become a luxury that I cannot afford. If everything goes "well", I may even be moving on to a new area next year - and I suppose I will be even further away from the "simple" state then. I really have to learn to embrace the new responsibilities and build my passion for teaching on them.
Foodcourts.
Sunday, November 1, 2009, 09:05 a.m. #1638.
I like the concept of foodcourts, where we get to come face-to-face with a perfect stranger and share some "intimate" moments together, having a meal together. We get to come so close that we can see every expression that each other makes, and we can't help but notice the peculiar eating habits that one may have. I especially like to observe how the person would avoid making eye contact with me, or the kind of passers-by that would attract her attention.
And we can never predict who is going to sit opposite us - a student, an office lady, a man in suit, an uncle, an auntie... There are those who would pick out all the beanstalks before they start eating, and there are those who can finish their food in a flash. There are people who show their satisfaction visibly on their face while savoring their food, and there are people who don't even look at their food while eating. There are those who would feel pressured to finish their meal when people are standing around, and there are those who would take out their newspapers to read in the same situation.
And of course, we get to see all sorts of people around. Occasionally we see heartwarming scenes like couples feeding each other or a mother sharing food with her child, and sometimes we get a bit of comic relief when a person is too embarrassed to tell her friend that there's a stranded grain of rice stuck on her friend's cheek.
Then there is this perennial problem of how I should indicate my answer whenever someone asks if she could sit beside me. In the kind of noisy environment, it's quite hard to decipher whether the person is asking "is the seat taken?" or "can I share the seat with you?". I would usually smile and show a beckoning hand gesture to tell her that she's welcomed to sit down. Then again, even the welcoming palm can be ambiguous and misunderstood as a gesture to "defend" the seat, and the person may disappointingly walk away.
Have been so busy lately that I don't even frequent foodcourts that much anymore. I should probably force myself to go there more often - it can be quite therapeutic.